Getting down to the wire

So, we are less then a month a way. Which could be the reason I have not been posting. So here's the update:

We went and got our rings. Our rings have been passed down to us from my family. After going to the jeweler, he pointed out that there was a Russian mark on both bands. We thought he was joking, until he had us look at the band them selves. And there it was a star with a hammer and sickle, it looked something similar to this:

(Source)

Last week my work had a shower for me. It was so wonderful for Dr. Ruggeri to open her home for this amazing shower.

I love the tea cups and delicious treats.

Stacey, Mary M., & Sue puased to smile at the camera, after getting somthing to eat.

Diane & Mary S. smile for the camera

Dr. Misty Day & Dr. Amy Dunbar check out the cookbook.

Kara & Gina also checking out the cookbook.

Joyce telling us about her bird.

Gail smiling at the camera.

Me & Sue, I'm not sure what I was taking about here.

I had so much fun. It was a great way to end the week.

(all photos taken by Dr. Ruggeri)

Shower of Love2

 I know this is going to sound like I an repeating my self. So, I'm just going to skip right to the picture from the Lanis Shower(my mother's side). Enjoy!

The Food: Russian appetizers

The Drinks: wine,champagne, and water

The desserts: Fresh fruit, chocolate covers strawberries, and Russian pasties...yummy

My grandfather was greeting the guests at the door.

I still keeping my bar tending skills active. Making sure every one had a drink.

My mother getting every ones attention for the first welcoming toast.

My grandmother's friend giving me a toast to the future.

Cheers!

Marina my cousin admiring the blue bling on the table. So sparkly!

(All pictures taken my by cousin Julia. I so happy she was able to capture this beautiful day)

So much has happend

I had my first shower. Yes, I said first, because there will be more to come. Unfortunately with divorced parents, actually it feels more like divorced families, you always have more then one holiday celebration. I have had to go to two holiday celebrations(Chanukah,Passover,Thanksgiving, etc.) for over seven years. Why should a bridal shower be any different, I guess it's more for my sanity...I could not imagine even at my own wedding how my families will act when they see each other. I know weddings are different, but there will be tension. I'm glad they are postponing that till it gets closer to our wedding.

This shower was held by my father's side. My grandmother, cousin/bridesmaid Janna, and Janna's mother Olia who hosted the shower. I loved it, just look at the hard work they did in just the decorating.

My aunts and cousins from my father's side were all there. Also Nick's mother and one of his sisters were there to  celebrate. I was really wonderful to have all of women on my father's side in one room. Not only were the decorations great, but also the food and games.

Here Janna is announcing what the next shower game we will play.

Here I am, just finding out it's a quiz for me from Nick.

We had such a great time. It was so nice to share this experience with the women in my family and Nick's family too.

Oh and I almost for got this picture. My cousin Janna would not be happy with this post it I did not show you this:

(All photos are from Janna and her mother)

They out there

Created, sealed, and sent. What else, but my invitations. They out there now for the viewing public. I'm just happy I can show you them now.

Yes, that's my corner punch. I got a little corner punching happy during the last of the invitation. Guess your wondering what's inside....

So on the top, is all of it together. I would call these invitations semi-DIY. I found the invitation kit from Target. I thought it looked simple and elegant at the same time. As for the envelopes they were blank, so I decided to add the gold detailing. Guess what it's made from...gift wrapping paper! Unfortunately I did run out of those envelopes, some guest instead had this envelope...

I don't like it as much. But at lest it matches the invitations.

(All pictures taken by me, sorry for the iPhone quality)

OMG

(Source)

We have passed our 100th day mark. Now we're in the double digits. I feel like I have the basics of a wedding done. Ceremony, reception, flowers, dress/shoes, photographer, music, and cake are all done. Now it's just creating the little details that will make our wedding ours.

Wedding Paid by Cans

(Source)

Just read an article of a couple who is paying for there wedding completely by cans that they have saved. Talk about making your wedding unique and green. I really do admire their contribution to keeping their life green. Read the article here.

What have I done....

I am kicking my self for the mistake I've made. It's making me emotional, I'm not supposed to get emotional over something so small. Actually I hate my self for getting emotional and making this small mistake. Would this define me as a "Bridezilla"? I have this fear as it gets closer to the wedding of becoming one. I've watch the show "Bridezilla" in hopes of finding the signs of what has triggered these women to become so obsessed with their wedding. I'm realizing now, that weddings bring up emotions and conversations that would have never come up in any other situation. Creating a large event that not only pleases you but also family and friends can put a bride under a lot of pressure. Does not help, not know the traditions of how or when to do things for you wedding....making it perfect and proper, not tacky and rude.

Ok, so let me back track to what mistake I have made...On our invitations the address (number only) is wrong for our ceremony site. Of course I only find this out after I have printed and sent a few to my family and out of town guest (on my side). I was sure that I had double checked everything. Well, at least on the website we have the right address.

As for why I have sent a few so early...that is because I have been pressured by my family to find out how many would not be able to come...so that they can invite more. Remember one of my first posts about the guest list, they still won't stop about having more and more people invited. So, I have agreed to send out some invitations (only on my side) early...that way if there is space, we could invite others. The things I do to please my family.

Invitations Part 1

I'm so excited. My invitations are being printed as we speak. Looking forward to seeing them all tomorrow! Kinko's is the best. Sorry, but you will have to wait for the big reveal until they have been sent.

Grand Enterance

Entering for the first time as husband and wife...the curtain rises and here come the couple. No thank you.

We are not ones to have a grand entrance into our reception. Both Nick and I don't like the idea of being in the spotlight. Even walking down the isle with all eyes on me weirds me out a little. I don't really like being the center of attention. Is there really a need for a grand enterance, this guy says there is:

I'm glad I don't have him as our DJ

Music to my ear

Lets talk about music. Band or DJ. You would think that my clear choice would be to pick a band to play. After all all, my cousins who have been married before me have chosen to have a band play that their weddings. They brought them in from either Chicago or New York. Why you ask, because it must be a Russian band. Here again my family roots come in to play even in the music.

(This is not the band. I just really love this song.)

I chose to have a DJ for three main reasons. First, to have a combination of American music and Russian music with a little Jewish tradition music (for the chair lifting part, not looking forward too, but it is tradition). Second, lower price then a band. Third, I have more of a control with the level of volume.

The search was on to find a DJ, luckily I did not have to look very far. Thanks to my cousin Janna and her connections we found FMF Enterprises. Nick and I even went to hear him play at the St Peter's RexPlex ice skating ring. We contacted him and saved our date. He's willing to work with us by adding Russian music to his already large playlist.

Wedding Shoes

I have turned away from tradition when it comes to my wedding shoes. For me it does not seem logical to purchase something that you will only wear one day. Not only does this go for my shoes, but also my dress. Now, you may ask how could I wear a wedding dress twice and the truth is, I have not. However, another bride has. I have purchased a used wedding dress, which I have fallen in love with. Sorry, but pictures of the dress will have to wait. I do like to keep the tradition of the groom no seeing the dress till the day of the wedding. So as a precaution I will not be showing picture of my dress till after the wedding.

Now on to the subject of shoes. I just can not picture my self wearing white shoes more then once. So, I was in search of a shoe that I could see my self wearing again. Going along the same theme of my wedding dress, I decided to check resale shops. Which is where I found these:

I thought these would be it. Classic,gold, old fashion shoes. They even have a hint of blue in them with the beading. I thought those were the shoes for my wedding day (and any other day), that was until I started to see these great pictures:

Source

Source

I went on a hunt to find a red shoe. After all a red shoe wouldn't be a bad addition to my shoe collection. I even have a red dress,which I was looking for red shoes to match. So, last week I went with my cousin Janna (one of my bridesmaids) to the mall. That's where I spotted them, in Payless Shoes. Just look at these, how could you not buy them:

As a bonus I found this clutch to go with everything:

I can not wait to wear my wedding dress with these shoes. They also match perfectly with my red dress.

Traditions

As I wrote before, my family are Russian Jews, as most of you know this. For this reason Nick and I chose to pay respect to my families Jewish traditions and have our wedding in a temple. Of course this was no easy task for us to do. To start, you should know that Nick is not Jewish, and I do not go to temple or belong to a congregation. This makes things a little complicated. The one person I know in my family who is very religious is my grandmother on my father's side. She belongs to a very conservative temple. She ask the Rabbi there for us, and that was a definite "NO", that is, unless Nick converted. I found there to be no reason for Nick to convert, if another temple would be willing to marry us. My grandmother's Rabbi did know of another Rabbi, Rabbi Stiffman, in the area that would be able to marry us. The temple he is affiliated with ,Shaare Emeth, was the one I was hoping for. We called him as soon as we got his number. He happily met up with us to hear our story and said he would be delighted to marry us. I was so happy I could have jumped up and gave him a hug. (Don't worry I didn't.)

Just so you know not all Jewish ceremonies have to be in a temple. There are just a few things required for a Jewish wedding ceremony. These are the ones we plan on following:

1. A Rabbi to perform the ceremony.

Rabbi Stiffman, Source

2. Nick will be wearing a kippah. A kippah is cap worn by Jewish men and sometimes women, or in this case a man who is getting married in a temple. Traditionally it is to remind man that there is always something between God and him. It is a sign of humility, and acknowledgement to God. Who knew there could be a Jewish Kitty,Source

3. We will be signing a ketubah. A ketubah is a Jewish marriage contract. It is signed by both bride and groom, the Rabbi, and two Jewish witnesses, before the wedding ceremony.
My parents at their wedding signing their katubah

4. We will get married under a chuppah. A chuppah or huppah is like a canopy, covering the Rabbi, bride and groom, during the wedding ceremony. The chuppah translates to covering. It symbolizes the bride and grooms new home together. Remember Fiddler on the Roof, Source

5. We will say the traditional Jewish vows in english as well as exchange rings.

6. Nick will shatter the glass. Some say that the glass symbolizes the couple, and when it is broken they become a Jewish married couple. Others say that the breaking of the glass reminds Jews of the destruction of the Temple.

Ouch, glad he's wearing shoes.Source

As for the reception, unfortunately I will have to deal with getting lifted up on a chair. I'm not really looking forward to that.

Delay

Sorry about the lag of posting. This week is what you would call hell week for me. I found out a few thinks that could change the plans of the wedding. But let me start from where we left off.

So, last weekend my plan was to find a florist. I met up with five different florist. Lets just say I had no time to spend with my fiance. No, he doesn't like to come with me to the appointments, especially for flowers. And who would blame him, he would be board out of his mind. So, the first florist I went to, after the consult, never sent me a quote. The second, I went with my cousin Janna, we met up with her at Starbucks. I was recommend to her by my photograph thinking that, I thought she would be good and reasonable. Well, her picture were nice, but first she recommend for me to have green flowers (my colors have NO! green in them) and then her price was not in my budget. The third florist, I drove out into the middle of nowhere (Troy,MO) to her house, she also recommend green, and her price was worse then the other. At this point I was beginning to loose hope for all florist, was I ever going to have a florist that listened to me as to what I wanted? The fourth finally did, however her price was not the best. Here I was thinking that I was never going to be able to afford flowers at my wedding. That was until I went to MarryMe Flowers. Yes, she was working from her home, but she had a very good vibe about her, her cost was perfect, and she listen to what I wanted. Best advice I can give to those on a strict budget, shop around. You will find it, it is out there for you.

Which brings us to this week. Monday, work was fine, went to my grandmothers house on my mother's side, just as I do every Monday after work. But this week I had to go over to my grandmother on my father's side to pick up the check for deposits (DJ,flowers,cake, wedding stuff etc.) There she throws a curve ball at me, tells me she has something important to tell me. My father didn't want to tell me him self, well when the only communication facility you have is e-mail it can be hard to tell you daughter, he has cancer. There I am my grandmother breaking down in front of me and the person who should be telling me the news miles away. Instantly I can not react to the news, only to my grandmother breaking down, so I comfort her. The only time I was able to contemplate what I just heard "Your father has rectal cancer, he may not be able to come to the wedding." was in my car, which is where I broke down. In result, I rushed back to my mother's side and there Nick(my fiance) met up to comfort me. This is why I know I am marrying the right man, I didn't even ask him to come, he looked up the address and rushed over.

In recent news after e-mailing back and forth with my father, he say that Nick and I should not move our date. In resent tests, the cancer looks like it is not spreading. So, there is a little sigh of relief. And I still hope he will be well enough to come to our wedding.

Bridal Show Test

Let me just warn you now, my post is about bridal shows. There is a lot of information out there for brides and one way to get it is through a bridal show. However, if you are not a person who likes crowds or people that harass you to sign up, then a Bridal Show is not for you.

I decided to do a test, I went to two bridal shows. The first bridal show, I was very prepared. I had some one with me, I had address labels made, and I had comfortable shoes. The only thing I did not know was what vendors would be there. My experience was good, however I felt very overwhelmed. Every where I looked there was another thing to put your name in for a raffle. A bit of a warning, unless you don't mind some stranger calling you phone, use a fake number. Also give them a "junk" e-mail address, because they with send information every day.

The second bridal show I went alone, did not bring labels or good shoes. I chose to go alone this time because I knew I only wanted to meet with a few vendors. The vendors I went to see, I have already made appointments for a consultation, I was just hoping that they would have a show discount. Most vendors have a show discount, you do not need to be pressured to sign up for this discount at the show. Most of the vendors, if you are interested will contact you again, to see if you still want the discount.

I highly recommend the to wear comfortable shoes and to bring address labels. Also bring your calender and make appointments for a consultation. This way they can take the time to talk with you and not a group of brides. The vendors are there to answer your question, find out their prices and don't be afraid to tell them that they are out of your price rage. Some vendors, if they are willing to work with you, will give a lower price that could fit in your budget.

So far because of the bridal show, I have found my photographer. Plus I have made many appointments to get together with other vendors.

Invitation Only

My latest transition is that I will be getting married this October. And it has yet to be an easy ride. To give you a little background, my parents are divorce which for most people would be OK, except that they are paying for the wedding. And neither one wants to pay more then the other. Not only that, but my father is living overseas with his new wife and son. My only communication with him is through e-mail and my grandmother. Normally I wouldn't mind this, except if my grandmother is upset with me, so is my father. So, I try to keep on good terms with both of them.

I wish that my fiance and I could come up with the finances our selves, but just like many other people in the United States we have had bad luck with the economy. Actually I wasn't expecting to get engaged so soon because at the time my fiance did not have a job. But he had surprised me with his family ring in the Botanical Gardens. It's beautiful and even more special because not only did it come from him, but from him family as well.

I have had many discussions with my family about the wedding. Mostly because of the guest list. You see, my family is Russian on both sides. If they had the chance they would invite the whole St. Louis Russian Jewish community to my wedding. Not only would that be unfair for my fiance's family, but my budget would be over drawn. I hate to be the wedding budget Nazi, but it is the only way to keep them from over inviting people.

I'm looking forward to be married. I'm just not looking forward to dealing with my own family as I get there.

What is in a Name...

You are probably wondering why have I named my blog as such. Every one has transitions in life, or moments is life. These will be mine. I've had many of these moments in my life already, such as from moving to different states, having dramatic moments such as separating from family then getting reunited. But we will get into all of that later.

Right at this time I just want to introduce myself. You can call me Miss ARG, yes like what a pirate would say. I'm here because as most other bloggers I feel like I have something to share. If you would like to hear more you are more then welcome to keep reading. For those that don't I'm glad I at least got to share with you this moment.